17 posts from September 2007

QUIZMANIA (ITV)
Greg Scott: We're looking for an occupation beginning with 'T'.
Contestant: Doctor.
Scott: No, it's 'T'. 'T' for Tommy. 'T' for Tango.
Contestant: Oh, right . . . (pause) . . . Doctor.
DANNY KELLY SHOW (RADIO WM)
Kelly: Which French Mediterranean town hosts a famous film festival every year?
Contestant: I don't know, I need a clue.
Kelly: OK. What do beans come in?
Contestant: Cartons?
BEG, BORROW OR STEAL (BBC2)
Jamie Theakston: Where do you think Cambridge University is?
Contestant: Geography isn't my strong point.
Theakston: There's a clue in the title.
Contestant: Leicester.
BBC NORFOLK
Stewart White: Who had a worldwide hit with What A Wonderful World?
Contestant: I don't know.
White: I'll give you some clues: what do you call the part between your hand and your elbow?
Contestant: Arm.
White: Correct. And if you're not weak, you're...?
Contestant: Strong.
White: Correct - and what was Lord Mountbatten's first name?
Contestant: Louis.
White: Well, there we are then. So who had a worldwide hit with the song What A Wonderful World?
Contestant: Frank Sinatra?
LATE SHOW (BBC MIDLANDS)
Alex Trelinski: What is the capital of Italy?
Contestant: France.
Trelinski: France is another country. Try again.
Contestant: Oh, um, Benidorm.
Trelinski: Wrong, sorry, let's try another question. In which country is the Parthenon?
Contestant: Sorry, I don't know.
Trelinski: Just guess a country then.
Contestant: Paris.
UNIVERSITY CHALLENGE (BBC2)
Jeremy Paxman: What is another name for 'cherrypickers' and 'cheesemongers'?
Contestant: Homosexuals.
Paxman: No. They're regiments in the British Army who will be very upset with you.
THE WEAKEST LINK (BBC2)
Anne Robinson: Oscar Wilde, Adolf Hitler and Jeffrey Archer have all written books about their experiences in what: prison, or the Conservative Party?
Contestant: The Conservative Party.
BEACON RADIO (WOLVERHAMPTON)
DJ Mark: For Pounds 10, what is the nationality of the Pope?
Ruth from Rowley Regis: I think I know that one. Is it Jewish?
THE WEAKEST LINK
Anne Robinson: In traffic, what 'J' is where two roads meet?
Contestant: Jool carriageway?
UNIVERSITY CHALLENGE
Bamber Gascoigne: What was Gandhi's first name?
Contestant: Goosey?
GWR FM (Bristol)
Presenter: What happened in Dallas on November 22, 1963?
Contestant: I don't know, I wasn't watching it then.
RTE RADIO 2FM (IRELAND)
Presenter: What is the name of the long- running TV comedy show about pensioners: Last Of The ...?
Caller: Mohicans.
QUIZMANIA
Greg Scott: We're looking for a word that goes in front of 'clock'.
Contestant: Grandfather.
Scott: Grandfather clock is already up there, say something else.
Contestant: Panda.
PHIL WOOD SHOW (BBC RADIO MANCHESTER)
Phil: What's 11 squared?
Contestant: I don't know.
Phil: I'll give you a clue. It's two ones with a two in the middle.
Contestant: Is it five?
RICHARD AND JUDY
Q: Which American actor is married to Nicole Kidman?
A: Forrest Gump.
RICHARD AND JUDY
Leslie: On which street did Sherlock Holmes live?
Contestant: Er . . .
Leslie: He makes bread . . .
Contestant: Er . . .
Leslie: He makes cakes . . ..
Contestant: Kipling Street?
MAGIC 52 (NORTHEAST ENGLAND)
Presenter: In what year was President Kennedy assassinated?
Contestant: Erm . . .
Presenter: Well, let's put it this way - he didn't see 1964.
Contestant: 1965?
SIMPLY THE BEST (ITV)
Phil Tufnell: How many Olympic Games have been held?
Contestant: Six.
Tufnell: Higher!
Contestant: Five.
FORT BOYARD (CHALLENGE TV)
Jodie Marsh: Arrange these two groups of letters to form a word - CHED
and PIT.
Team: Chedpit.
LINCS FM PHONE-IN
Presenter: Which is the largest Spanish-speaking country in the world?
Contestant: Barcelona.
Presenter: I was really after the name of a country.
Contestant: I'm sorry, I don't know the names of any countries in Spain.
RADIO 1 EARLY MORNING SHOW
Presenter: How many toes would three people have in total?
Contestant: 23.
NOTTS AND CROSSES QUIZ (BBC RADIO NOTTINGHAM)
Jeff Owen: In which country is Mount Everest?
Contestant (long pause): Er, it's not in Scotland, is it?
Girdler: I'm looking for an island in the Atlantic whose name includes the letter 'e'.
Contestant: Ghana.
Girdler: No, listen. It's an island in the Atlantic Ocean.
Contestant: New Zealand.
NATIONAL LOTTERY (BBC1)
Question: What is the world's largest continent?
Contestant: The Pacific
ROCK FM (PRESTON)
Presenter: Name a film starring Bob Hoskins that is also the name of a famous painting by Leonardo Da Vinci.
Contestant: Who Framed Roger Rabbit?
THE BIGGEST GAME IN TOWN (ITV)
Steve Le Fevre: What was signed to bring World War I to an end in 1918?
Contestant: Magna Carta.
JAMES O'BRIEN SHOW (LBC)
O'Brien: How many kings of England have been called Henry?
Contestant: Er, well, I know there was a Henry the Eighth ... er ... er ... three?
NATIONAL LOTTERY
Eamonn Holmes: There are three states of matter: solid, liquid and what?
Contestant: Jelly.
RICHARD ALLINSON SHOW (RADIO 2)
Allinson: What international brand shares its name with the Greek goddess of victory?
Contestant (after long deliberation): Erm, Kellogg's?
BLIND DATE (ITV)
Girl: Name a book written by Jane Austen.
Boy: Charlotte Bronte.
CHRIS SEARLE SHOW (BBC RADIO BRISTOL)
Searle: In which European country is Mount Etna?
Caller: Japan.
Searle: I did say which European country, so in case you didn't hear that, I can let you try again.
Caller: Er ... Mexico?
DOG EAT DOG (BBC1)
Ulrika Jonsson: Who wrote Lord of the Rings?
Contestant: Enid Blyton
PAUL WAPPAT (BBC RADIO NEWCASTLE)
Paul Wappat: How long did the Six-Day War between Egypt and Israel last?
Contestant (after long pause): Fourteen days.
NATIONAL LOTTERY
Eamonn Holmes: Dizzy Gillespie is famous for playing what?
Contestant: Basketball.
NOTTS AND CROSSES QUIZ
Jeff Owen: Where did the D-Day landings take place?
Contestant (after pause): Pearl Harbour?
DARYL DENHAM'S DRIVETIME (VIRGIN RADIO)
Daryl Denham: In which country would you spend shekels?
Contestant: Holland?
Denham: Try the next letter of the alphabet.
Contestant: Iceland? Ireland?
Denham (helpfully): It's a bad line. Did you say Israel?
Contestant: No.
PHIL WOOD SHOW (BBC GMR)
Wood: What 'K' could be described as the Islamic Bible?
Contestant: Er . . .
Wood: It's got two syllables . . . Kor . . ..
Contestant: Blimey?
Wood: Ha ha ha ha, no. The past participle of run . .. .
Contestant: (Silence)
Wood: OK, try it another way. Today I run, yesterday I . . .
Contestant: Walked?
NATIONAL LOTTERY
Dale Winton: Skegness is a seaside resort on the coast of which sea:a) Irish Sea, b) English Channel, c) North Sea?
Contestant: Oh, I know that, you can start writing out the cheque now, Dale. It's on the east coast, so it must be the Irish Sea.
THE VAULT
Melanie Sykes: What is the name given to the condition where the sufferer can fall asleep at any time?
Contestant: Nostalgia.
LUNCHTIME SHOW (BRMB)
Presenter: What religion was Guy Fawkes?
Contestant: Jewish.
Presenter: That's close enough.
BREAKFAST SHOW, RADIO 1
Chris Moyles: Which 'S' is a kind of whale that can grow up to 80 tonnes?
Contestant: Ummm . . .
Moyles: It begins with 'S' and rhymes with 'perm'.
Contestant: Shark.
STEVE WRIGHT IN THE AFTERNOON (BBC RADIO 2)
Wright: Johnny Weissmuller died on this day. Which jungle-swinging character clad only in a loincloth did he play?
Contestant: Jesus.

A few weekends ago I was scheduled to be at Jollyes here in High Wycombe both days. They were holding an information weekend for their customers with myself as the dog trainer for questions and answers, several rescues represented, dog groomer, nutritionist and a few others.

I heard on the Wednesday prior that the Jollyes store in Enfield sold puppies. I had been told that Jollyes didn’t sell kittens or puppies when I was first asked to take part in the weekend. I investigated. It would appear that within the Jollyes store at Enfield they rent space/a room to a company by the name of Brothers and it is this company who sell the pups. At the time I rang there were six different breeds available of both sexes between 8 and 12 weeks of age. They tell me they charge £1200 for a pup to ensure that only serious people will purchase one. The only after sales service they provide is that they ask the new owners to bring the pup to see their vet a week to ten days after purchase.

No-one was prepared to tell me where the pups come from but did tell me that some were KC registered - I may be wrong here but I thought that KC registered pups had to be sold by the breeder and not a third party?

They don’t take the pups in before the age of 8 weeks and they are seen weekly by their vet. The RSPCA conduct checks and have no complaints. It would seem that the pups are kept clean, their areas are kept clean, they get food and water - all the basic requirements are fulfilled. The RSPCA of course can only deal with and report on the pups in situ not question from whence they came or who they go to. I asked what happens to the pups who don’t get sold? The answer was that they reduce the price until it does get sold. I asked what socialisation the pups get if they can be in store for 4, 6, maybe 8 weeks. I was asked what socialisation was. I tried to explain about development and the key times in a pups life to experience things to be stable in later life but it was wasted I feel. It was mentioned that the average time most pups are there is a couple of weeks ( how many pups is that a year?)

I spoke again to the manager here at High Wycombe expressing my concerns about being associated with a company who condone such business and said that I would not be there for the weekend. I also spoke to a few of the other participants who I have met and some of them also withdrew, surprisingly not the local rescue or local Blue Cross.

Not going to this weekend has cost me business. There would have been the chance of one to one bookings locally and I am certain that out of the weekend I would have filled 3-6 places for the clicker training day I held yesterday. I still wouldn’t do it but Jollyes don’t appear to have the same ethics and are happily making money from the rent they get for the space plus the purchases made by the new puppy owners on the way out through the store.

I felt that I should bring this to the attention of as many people as possible and ask that you inform others also.

I have spent the last half hour reading on a dog rescue forum I frequent in the chatter section. I have been in tears for most of that time.

Story one was about a young Rottie girl pup found in a tied up plastic bag with her tail cut and other cuts/injuries, luckily found by a caring dog owner and taken to the vets and is now being cared for by a rescue.

Story two, again a very young pup of probably greyhound origins so badly infested with fleas that even when the rescue picked of over 100 she was still riddled and aneamic because of them. Her belly is so full of worms you would think she has a hernia and she cannot keep any food down as there is a tear to her gullet and other internal damage. This babe is now at the vets on an iv drip for nutrition and will be going to a specialist hospital in the morning.

Story three. A 13 year old quiet lurcher girl killed by a pack of four dogs whilst on a walk and her owner injured in the process - the man who owned the dogs just left her there, injured with a dead dog. Thank goodness her 5 year old twins were not with her this walk.

sometimes I am so ashamed to be part of the human race, there are some very sick people out there.

Saw this on a Dane forum I frequent. Alot of it really is laugh out loud funny, especially if you are a Dane or large breed owner. Some of the things are along the same lines and become a little repetitive but still worth looking through for sure.

The things people say

Enjoy. I did.

Mr T always gets let off first and Byron loves to chase after him, its like he might miss out on something if he doesnt catch MR T up

Then they run about more or less together for a while

and they do lots of sniffering about

and looking for squirrels

We all play hide and seek, I'm the bestest at hidering, here is Byron coming to find me ( he went straight past of course and saw me when he turned round )

Out of MR Trevor and Byron who do you think is best at hidering?

I think Mr Trevor is the winner Byron always thinks you cant see him if he hides his head, he cracks me up

If you have been paying attention then you will know that a couple of weeks back me and my canine crew were driven to Leicester to meet Boris and the meeting went quite well. He was supposed to be coming here last Friday for a visit but his transport was being updated and crated out so we all had to wait til yesterday.

Well, Helen and Paul the breeders , Boris and another of their Danes called Ghost duly arrived and mingled for a couple of hours,all was well so they left Boris with me after signing of paperwork much like adoption papers.

Heres a few pics from yesterday

P1020754

                                                                  BORIS ON THE BACK STEP

P1020774

P1020775

                                                              WHY WONT MR TREVOR PLAY

P1020758

                                                                    THESE ARE OF GHOST

P1020757

 So far so good, no issues have arisen between the dogs. Boris hasnt eaten but he is unsettled so I am not worried as yet.

Which runway show at New York Fashion Week do you wish you could attend?

 

Fashion ? ? ?

 

New York? Me?

 

 

Not in a million years

Did you guess?

Do you want a clue?

WATER

Another ?

SHARKS

Got it now?

Yep, I will be swimming with sharks at The Blue Planet Aquarium Cheshire. This is the last of my trilogy of challenges to raise money for Hearing Dogs for Deaf People and a real personal one for me as I suffer with claustriphobia.

I dont know how many people actually read this but if each of you would please go to this site and sponsor me just a few pounds each it would really help a deaf person and a rescue dog. Hearing Dogs select over 70% of their dogs from rescue centres around the UK and Eire. These dogs change lives. As a speaker for the Charity it moves me to tears every time I hear a recipient talk about the difference their dog has made. This Charity receives no government funding, please give a little to help make a great difference.

Its true and not my Great Dane.

see here